Match: Day 18

One more day people! I don’t know why I am so excited, I am not turning 13 or 16 or AAEAAQAAAAAAAAdVAAAAJGU0ODNiYTFhLTY5OWMtNGU3NC05Zjg1LTJhNTQ0ZDI5ZGQxMweven 21!

I keep seeing the Match.com ad on my Hulu stream and I was just about to text “FREE” to the number so that I can enjoy 7 days of free Match and find a boyfriend for my birthday… but I forget the number to text…

Oh Well… Back to the drawing board.

A day In the Life of CrazyTown

My tomorrow just got a heck of a lot busier than I even imagined.

I thought that adding another company to my workload would be simple, I have worked with multiple companies at the same time often but I think I blocked out the experience. So welcome to a day in the life. Here is a list of what I have going on tomorrow. This list does not factor in any unforeseen roadblocks or hazards. Here we go:

7:30am drop the kids off at school, from that time until 8:45am I have two sites to visit for company A. I have to be home clocked in and logged on and on the phone with company B for a web meeting from 9-10:30 followed by another web meeting with Company B from 10:30-11(thankfully with the same host so if I’m late, it’s because of him). I have a third web meeting from 11:30-12 followed by another from 12-1. That last will be tricky because they are hosted by different people and they hate when you’re late! After all of those meetings I will visit 2 more sites for company A before picking up the children from school by 2:50. I will run them straight to my mother’s house because I got a rush 24hr site inspection for company A tonight. I will do that rush plus 3 more before getting the kids home. I should be done working and ready for date night by 7pm barring any explosions or tragic accidents. Sounds like a long day with a lot of stuff. I should be fineeee (my best Varner impression)

The rush one sounds kind of exciting! I get to pretend I don’t know what’s going on, I get to really pretend my PI skills are tops

Yup That happened

I drove into the sunset this evening. It was bright and ever fiber of my being told me to jut turn back.

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I dropped the kids off at my mother’s house and continued on my way. I couldn’t turn back now, I had already agreed to participate on the day we went to Start on The Street. I knew that if I didn’t, I would just be continuing down the same road and none of my circumstances would change.

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Every sign that I saw screamed STOP! Why are you doing this?

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I did it! I went to that Kung-fu class and I did NOT die! I got complimented on forms I didn’t know and I survived. I held my own! This was the first time I participated in a group physical activity since middle school. Following my own rules and guidelines for changing your life is the hardest thing ever but I am game. I took the first step in redefining my Body Environment 9 Environments of You and I am exhausted.

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Mommy puts herself in bootcamp

I just had to have the worlds most difficult conversation with my children. My throat still has the hugest lump in it from fighting back the tears. I have had to have many of conversations with them about things but this one was long overdue. We/they don’t have the most things in the world, but I have pretty much been able to get away with getting them the things they request. Years ago it started with the X-box 360 and all the games that go with it, plus the connect. They have had PSP’s and tablets and more tablets and handheld Nintendo game thingy. They got a Wii for Christmas a couple years ago and a Wii-U for this Christmas that just past. They have a PlayStation 3 now and games galore. Movies and oh yeah, there are the phones that I am now missing two of.

Today I have reached my limit. Castle Crashers, a $15 downloadable game that I have told them they could not get today. My oldest, and arguable the most spoiled of the bunch, asked me to put it on my credit card. I asked him if he had the money to pay the card and he looked shocked. Like it just comes from nowhere. They talked my ear off at breakfast about this game and how they have it at their dad’s house. I listened for about an hour and they enjoy the game. This was before the “put it on your card” request.

I made some grilled cheese, grilled ham and cheese with a side of sliced green and red apples and green and red grapes for lunch. Just as soon as this lunch was consumed, the oldest asked… “Can I have a snack?” I told him no, he just had lunch and I moved on from it. He then comes to me in a whine, saying how he doesn’t know what to do now, he would like to know when they were going to dad’s house. I kind of lost it.

I didn’t yell or scream, I just talked. I walked through the house cutting off the X-box, and then the Wii-U and took away the phone and tablet. I explained to them about the need to appreciate the things they have, that needing more all the time is just not a sign of appreciation. I was told that they did appreciate their things, but I think somewhere along the line I have been trying to overcompensate for the ending of the marriage by giving them “things”. Well times have changed, it is time that I be the mom that I should’ve been and set some rules and guidelines for this behavior.

Optimism is a strategy for making a better future… #quote #future #jumpforjoy

Optimism is a strategy for making a better future… #quote #future #jumpforjoy.

Optimism is step 1! Action is step 2!

I am about to make some changes. Personal changes that will lift my spirits and bring me back to center. I am extremely extremely hopeful and happy