Therapy today aka hanging with my paid bestie. I call it that because she and I both agree that I am stable and have a healthy rational mind. I feel like we are similar in thinking and are able to have in depth conversation without judgement. Just to run it back a little for you, I started therapy when I started my Human Services major. The first professor I had suggested that we think about going to a counselor for two reasons: (1) It would give us an idea of what it is like from the clients perspective and (2) being a counselor, you get a lot of information that can linger and it is beneficial to have someone to process your own emotions with. It couldn’t have come at a better time because shortly after my first session with the therapist, the relationship I was in with Archer went psychically violent.
We have been meeting weekly ever sense, and just downgraded to bi-weekly because I am just about over the emotional turmoil.
Today she started our meeting with mentioning how much confidence I had and asked whether or not I knew about the confidence I presented outwardly. I told her I knew I have some confidence in myself but it was definitely a long long process and is still a work in progress. It didn’t happen overnight, it took years to even see myself as more that just an object and that part is still a struggle.
She said she had found the above quote on Pintrest and asked me if I believed it to be true. Let’s start with the fact that 90% of all percentages found on line are made up and move on. I think that most of the confidence we have starts off as a delusion (fake it till you make it) but over time with work and positive affirmations it becomes a truth.
I think that 100% of confidence is hard work unless of course you value no ones thoughts or feelings.
I feel like I strive to accept myself wholly. I love the good and the bad of me.
She said that the above mentioned is hard because we are always changing but I think that we are always changing because of the above mentioned. If there is something that I find I don’t accept about myself, I start by figuring out why I don’t accept this aspect. If it’s simply due to limited belief about self then I have a starting point to adjust and if it’s something that is simply superficial I change it. It may sound easy but I repeat, 100% of confidence in self is work..
Put the work in!
Stay true to you.