Did that title bring you here? Did it totally engulf you with feelings of anger? I hope so!
I was having a conversation last week with someone about relationships, having one, not having one etc. This person made a comment that really threw me for a loop. They said “I love when girls brag about having a man and he beats the shit out of them”. I get the sarcasm, it was the laughter that shocked me the most. I just don’t think the topic in any form, sarcasm or serious, is funny. I don’t think that some people realize how difficult it is to get out of a bad relationship, even when they stayed in one for long time. I think that excuses for their own tolerance for the abuse is made and everyone else suffering should “just leave”.
I, as I’m sure you have read, was in a relationship with someone that was emotionally abusive. I found it hard to leave this relationship because he would often threaten to end his life because, “you are my only reason to live, without you I will just kill myself”. It went as far as speeding off while drunk and saying he was headed for a pole…. loud screams and phone disconnects.. scariest time of my life.
I feel like I failed a lot of people because I couldn’t find the words to halt the laughter. I know it is because this person is so narrow-minded and judgmental that saying anything at all that doesn’t co-sign their opinion leads to an argument. Not only an argument, because I conduct myself very well in adult arguments, but a battle of being heard because they are the one that screams at the top of their lungs because no one else should have an opinion.
So, If you know someone that is going through or has been through a relationship that is toxic, please don’t say “you should just leave”. It really isn’t that simple.